i miss my friends and even some of the people who act like they´re my friends. i miss the united states, god bless her stained soul and brand new cheap shoes. god bless her good side.

today is the day that the lord has made. i will rejoice and be glad in it.

i went to an easter procession where men carry crosses, bands play, hay la bola de gente, and there are people dressed in robes like the KKK. only they´re purple. but with pointy hats and everything. i think they are supposed to be some sort of spirits that accompanied jesus in his death.

there was a man wrapped in barbwire and actually bleeding. i didn´t think it was for real, but i suppose the contextualization of jesus´death is all out and they suffer with him.

hell, christ seemed like some sort of masochist. i can relate, to some extent, i suppose, if only in putting out cigarettes on my arm.

and at one time, i felt pretty damn good up there on the cross.

the other day i really felt like a raw berghoef and egg sandwich on toast, but of course they were all out.

i´ve been watching movies and walking and eating. but not much else. i´m afraid i will never attain nothingness. which is allness, in it´s mask-like form.

today i got kicked out of class for not reading the story of the day. of the week.

fuck.
i guess i was supposed to go out in the hall and read it, from what i understood; still about 70 percent of the words flew over my head. i have to look them up. i guess it´s a story that all happens backwards.

fucking complicated alejo carpentier.